A speech by Tory MP Peter Bone, aiming to introduce a national Margaret Thatcher Day in the UK, was stopped after just 87 seconds when everyone else present realised what a massive fool he was making of himself.
Mr Bone began by stating that “For years I’ve upheld a Mrs Thatcher (God rest her soul) Day all of my own, on her Birthday, where I offer thanks for her altruism in giving us all the opportunity to rake in so much bloody money, you know?” before clapping and guffawing like a Harry Enfield character for three minutes.
He then went on to say that “…Mrs T (Heaven bless her immortal memory) was like a mother to all of us who earn more than seven figures, own more than two houses and know our place in society (at the top), and…” before Labour MPs questioned the necessity, timing and cost of such a holiday.
Conservative eye witnesses described how “Peter Bone [who’s name sounds like two euphemisms for a willy, Ed.] was verbally and intellectually attacked” and how he was “not allowed to eloquently express his most evident love, affection and wealth by prefacing any actual planned implementations with a string of compliments aimed at her late Greatness”.
The incident, the latest anti-government attack of many recently, is being investigated by the “Independent Committee for Protecting Barely-Elected Hate-Merchants from Criticism and Disagreement”, which was set up in the wake of 2010’s disgusting Twitter hashtag campaign #VoteLabour. They have yet to report.